


Better Be Me

by AlexM_Writes



Category: RuPaul's Drag Race RPF
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-26
Updated: 2017-10-26
Packaged: 2019-01-23 14:34:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,303
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12509608
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlexM_Writes/pseuds/AlexM_Writes
Summary: Sometimes you realize the love of your life is the love of your life when you're miles apart.





	Better Be Me

**Author's Note:**

> Quick One-Shot I thought of while listening to Make Up Your Mind.

[Hey. I’m sure you’ve already seen it so I’m sorry. I’m a little tipsy. Just ignore it?]

Katya furrowed her eyebrows at the screen of her phone. It was dark backstage and it seemed like the screen was a sun glaring up at her. She wasn’t at all sure what Trixie was referencing because she’d been working a show all day and had seen pretty much nothing interesting except for Alaska and Willam bickering like usual. 

[Not sure what you’re talking about. But if I figure it out I’ll ignore it. You okay?]

By the time she had another chance to check her phone there was no response from Trixie. She hadn’t even seemed to read the message yet. They were both on separate tours right now and finding the time to talk to each other ever was a constant struggle. Truthfully she hated every moment of it and counted down the days to filming more Unhh where she could capture her best friend once more. Pushing the thought from her mind she continued to pack up her dressing room to get it loaded on the bus once again, off to the next city like they did every other night.

Alaska was pressed next to her, drinking from a mostly empty beer bottle and talking to Courtney about… Something. She wasn’t exactly sure what. Katya was busy catching up on emails and texts that she’d been putting off all week. By the time she opened twitter it was almost 3 in the morning and almost thought about just exiting back out when she saw the number of notifcations waiting for her. But she tapped on it anyways, bringing her to several hundred messages with the same message waiting on her: had she seen Trixie’s tweet yet and was it talking about her. 

Well. That at least cleared up what Trixie was talking about, but when she went to her page it was clear it had already been deleted. Thankfully they had an army of fans that screenshotted every little thing they did and it took almost no time to find the tweet in mention. For a minute, her body feels like it’s been dropped into a tub of ice water without warning. She can’t find any words, unable to tear her eyes from the screen. Finally she has enough sense to excuse herself back to her bunk in the back where she curls up under her blankets, curtains firmly drawn to keep it dark. After steadying her breathing she unlocks her phone once more to read it again.

@Trixiemattel: It’s late and I think I’m in love with my best friend. How’s your day?

Now it wasn’t like Katya was naive enough to think she was the only person on this planet that Trixie would call her best friend, but she had made sure to text her to ignore it. But this didn’t make sense because they told each other everything, they were upfront and honest about things that were hard to talk about to other people. 

Letting out a slow breath she knew this wasn’t entirely true. Because Katya had always known she was in love with Trixie Mattel. Even when they were back on their season, messing with each other and generally getting to know each other she had felt it. Then after the season ended things had become different, more intense. She’d gone off the deep end after being eliminated. Drugs, drinking, anything that made her feel a little less like a failure. But Trixie had been there, staying in her apartment all night and telling her stories or singing songs. She’d nursed her back to health when she’d stopped drinking and couldn’t stop getting sick, she’d played the guitar when Katya’s brain wouldn’t shut up and kept her up all night, she’d held her hand on the bathroom floor on the nights she couldn’t find the boundary between Katya and Brian. It had all melted together into one unarguable fact. She was in love with Trixie.

She wasn’t even really thinking as she looked up where Trixie was on her tour, fingers flying over the screen to pull up the list and scan it for tomorrow’s date. They were going to be in Las Vegas and Trixie was stopping in Houston. That was a distance. But she would figure it out, had to figure it out. Before she knew what she was doing she was booking the plane ticket, ready to bail out of her own show to be there. To be by Trixie and figure out what was happening. She drifted off to sleep sometime around 5, letting the darkness overcome her and pass the rest of the long bus ride that would take her back to Trixie.

The plane landed in Houston and she was one of the first off, already hauling ass toward the taxi sign up. She hadn’t brought a bag to check in because she was too scared of getting slowed down by it. Some part of her felt a little bad for telling Alaska she had to skip tonight because of family problems but it was sort of true. Trixie was as much her family as anyone connected by blood and she was having a problem. Getting into the back of the taxi she tells the driver the address of the club before settling back, unlocking her phone. She found herself looking at her messages with Trixie, her last one still unread, and almost sending that she was coming. But that would ruin it all she decided, locking it again and fidgeting in place.

By the time they pulled up outside the club she felt ready to rip her skin off, or down 50 shots. One of the two. She was still in drag, she had figured they were more likely to let her in as Katya and it had kept her busy waiting in the bus. So with heels clicking on the pavement she made her way to the back door, flashing the manager a grin. Sure enough there was recognition there and they let her right through to the dressing rooms. 

It was still a while until the actual show started but she could hear the unmistakable sound of people gathered just outside in the main area. People were always excited to listen to Trixie perform, herself included, so it was no surprise they showed up so early. Then she was there, outside the dressing room door she knew Trixie had to be in. Letting out a slow breath she drops her bag to the side, stretching her neck out and trying to work up the courage to just open the door. Open the door and ask her what the hell that stupid tweet was supposed to mean. What they were, what they wanted to be, anything. 

She couldn’t remember opening the door but it swung open anyways, and there she was. Fully in drag already, blonde wig on and pounds of makeup applied. She was working on her eyeliner in the mirror, already saying over her shoulder, “I have another 20 minutes so you can just-” Then she stops, seeing Katya in the reflection and standing up sharply. “Kat. What- Why are you… Holy shit.” She’s turning and closing the distance to hug her best friend tightly, a gesture Katya happily allows, wrapping her own arms around the other queen to hold her there for a minute. To enjoy this moment of normal. “What are you doing here?” Trixie asks when they break apart, excited but clearly on edge.

Katya braces herself, forces the words that have been running around her head all day out of her mouth before she can think too much. “That tweet better have been about me or we’re about to have a really awkward conversation.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks so much for reading! Have any prompts? Wanna Roleplay with some Queens? Just wanna chat? Catch me on Tumblr at Trixya-RP


End file.
